The head of state has called for me, by name...

But I don't have time for him...
It's going to be a glorious day.

Phil space

China has a permanent base in orbit. Should we be happy, sad, pleased, enraged, worried, anxious, indifferent, sleepy, flatulent, garrulous...? It all depends on how you look at it.

If you come at it from the point of view of American technological and military superiority, as does Neil Armstrong, you will be dismayed:

"For a country that did so much for so long to achieve a leadership position in space exploration and exploitation, this is viewed by many as lamentably embarrassing and unacceptable," he told a congressional hearing on the future of space flight. "Nasa leaders enthusiastically assured the American people that the agency was embarking on a new age of discovery. But the termination of the shuttle, the cancellation of existing rocket and spacecraft programmes, the lay-off of thousands of aerospace workers [and] the outlook for American space activity through the next decade is difficult to reconcile with agency assertions."

Though, to be fair, there's probably an undertow of my-life's-work-pissed-away ire to Mr Armstrong' statement. Another indicator of the decline of American power, relative to other nations. In a year's time the Chinese space program will be able to put its own astronauts into space. If Americans want to reach the final frontier, for the time being, they'll have to hitch a lift with the Russians. Let's forget this is, ultimately, capitalist competition. In this race, once you lose an advantage it's very difficult to get it back.

From an abstract point of view this is a good development. Humankind's future belongs in space, just as 500 years ago European civilisation's future belonged across the ocean. The main aim of getting people into space for long periods is to reach Mars. Why? Because Mars is our prime target in the solar system. It once had an atmosphere, water and volcanism. Did it also have life? Might it still have life now in the form of a stealth biosphere? These questions have numerous implications, including right here on Earth. I have been reading about the adventures of the twin Mars Exploration Rovers. Achievements though they are, they have covered in years what would have taken a scientist days to achieve. Mars can only really be explored by human beings.

But this is not an abstract question. As we have mentioned this mini-space race is part of capitalist competition. This leads to tremendous cost and waste. Why does humanity need two competing space stations? Because of the capitalist nature of the race, states use huge, secretive, bureaucratic agencies. Amongst other drawbacks, the true cost of various programmes is only now coming to light.

The only long-term viable way to explore space is through open, accountable co-operation.

Shh - it's the Labour Party

Ed Milliband reckons our society is going through a 'quiet crisis'. Why should it be quiet I wonder?

Well, in 1998 Tony Blair promised to lead a quiet revolution (What do we want? Shh. When do we want it? Shh.). In the year 2000 he led a quiet mission to Africa. He was still being a quiet diplomat in 2011, and he was always the Quiet American.

The Labour party meanwhile underwent a quiet revolution in 2006, then again so did the city of Manchester in 2005. In 2009 Tony Blair said British attitudes toward homosexuality had undergone a quiet revolution too.

You've got to have sharp ears to be a Labour party member. Quiet down the back!

[Roobin's addition] Even Gordon Brown, in his short and troubled period at the top, got some time in for quiet revolutionising.

News and Spews

Tory government to raise the motorway speed limit to 80 miles per hour. Now you can get go to hell in a handcart quicker.

Civil service occupations in Greece prevent EU, ECB and IMF delegates from meeting in public buildings. F-ing go for it!

The surprise sit-ins, which began with civil servants declaring that they had taken over six ministries at 7am, meant that Evangelos Venizelos, the finance minister, was forced to hold the talks on the 2012 budget elsewhere."The measures being pursued by the government are totally counter-productive. It is obvious to everyone that they have failed … all they have achieved is the impoverishment of Greeks," said a member of Adedy's [Greek equivalent of the PCS] executive board. "These occupations are symbolic but what is not is our determination to overturn policies that have driven us into deadlock. In the last two years 300,000 small and medium-sized businesses have closed and by December we estimate there will be one and a half million unemployed. That's one person per family."

Baharain doctors jailed for upholding the hippocratic oath (especially that bit about "I will apply, for the benefit of the sick, all measures required...").

Twenty Bahraini medics who treated activists wounded during anti-government protests were jailed for between five and 15 years in sentences that were immediately denounced by medical bodies and human rights groups around the world.

The sentences were handed down by a military court set up to handle the trials, which stemmed from an Arab spring-inspired uprising in the country in February and March. It was crushed with the help of armies from Saudi Arabia and the Gulf states. Thirteen of the doctors and nurses received sentences of 15 years in prison, while another seven received terms of five to 10 years.

Elsewhere, Local government minister Eric Pickles has made a stunning breakthrough; people don't like rolling in their own filth (it's not, generally speaking, good for their physical and mental wellbeing), and it costs money to have it taken away.

And finally, The Onion, the original fake-news outlet, set up another fake news story (with more than a hint of dark irony). Some people forgot this fact and took it seriously.

List - bandname suggestions

The Sexness
Oral Roberts and the Frying Pan Riot
99 Inbred Buffoons Go By
Gorky's Zygotic Episode
Blandwave
Mig Jagr
Spongepant Squarebob
True or False?
Sundogs
Wayne Rooney and Other Animals
Noise Gate
Liam Neeson Hitting Stuff
Supposed to be Gas
Meat Feats

Remember Bolivia?

Latin American revolition, maaaan, it used to be right fashionable. Bolivia, Venezuela, provided hope and showed us the way... well, only a very little. The significance of the Arab Spring is exaggerated to some degree (in the best sense: the Arab revolution should provide hope and does show us the way, so long as people follow the Arab people's example, so long as we make it real here). Even a victorious workers Egypt would have difficultly making a gesture to the world to match Soviet Russia's withdrawal from World War One. Whatever else happened, the Russian Revolution brought peace to Europe at the time.

The rise of of Evo Morales and the Movement Toward Socialism is another exhibit in the case for permanent revolution. According to Morales' Vice President, Álvaro García Linera, the Movement Toward Socialism for the time being is a movement toward 'Andean Capitalism'. Well I never. Then again, the slogan of Nepal's Maoists in government has been make Nepal the Switzerland of Asia, an odd phrase, but the intent is clear.

If you don't want to break with the system of global capitalism, and that would be a daring thing to do in a place like Bolivia, then you have to accommodate yourself to it. There is a political row going on in Bolivia at the moment, over the building of a freeway through protected land. Morales natural supporters are going up against his government, using the old tactics of roadblocks and strikes.

Morales championed a new constitution in 2010 that granted Bolivia's 36 indigenous groups an as yet ill-defined autonomy. He promised to protect indigenous people from industry and developers.

But since winning election in December 2005 the president has been forced to weigh development against environmental protection. His "revolution" reached a crossroads last year when he decided to pursue a 190-mile (300km) jungle highway funded by Brazil through the Isiboro-Secure Indigenous Territory National Park, or TIPNIS, in the eastern lowlands state of Beni.

Quibbles about silly quotemarks aside ("revolution"? Why the ironic reference? Has Evo Morales forgotten to send off to OffRev for the right to call himself a revolutionary? We're back onto "self-styled" again) the important thing to note is Brazil. The slow decline of American power has left room for others to manoeuvre. The protesters suspect, rightly I think, that this development is to satisfy Brazillian capital, rather than indigenous need.

The trouble is, outside of the moment of primitive accumulation, only capital begets capital. Nothing will come from nothing. If the Bolivian government wants to initiate 50 years of Andean Capitalism it will have to go cap in hand to someone. The most rational calculations are sometimes self-defeating. Maybe who dares wins after all.

But one final note before we get too high and mighty:

About 1,000 people began a march on La Paz in mid-August from Beni's capital, Trinidad, to protest against the highway they say is an open invitation to loggers and coca-planting settlers and a threat to park inhabitants. That march was broken up on Sunday by riot police who used teargas and truncheons, arresting several hundred marchers but later freeing them under pressure from local people.

Bolivia's defence minister resigned immediately in protest at the crackdown and the interior minister followed, accepting responsibility for police actions. Morales announced on Monday that he was suspending the highway project and would let voters in the affected region decide its fate in a referendum. The original protesters against the highway have promised to resume their own march.

Can you imagine something like this happening in Britain, a government taking responsibility for its errors and trying to correct them? Of course not. Bolivia is a more democratic society than Britain.

Bitter rival John Jackson...

I see here Ed Milliband is standing for "people who don't hack phones, loot shops, fiddle expenses or earn huge salaries"; so just about everyone in Britain. It's about time someone stood up and said "I'm against those things everybody hates".

Margaret Hodge is against the BNP making racist and divisive statements

That's her preogative!

Margaret Hodge, the MP for Barking who won a hard-fought general election victory over the British National party, has accused Labour and the Conservatives of misleading the public over immigration.

The former children's minister told the Guardian that both parties have been playing a "numbers game" by claiming that they can cut the amount of people entering Britain. She said Labour should argue that the past decade's rise in immigrant numbers is simply a result of globalisation and that "people will come here, one way or another".

Not so much a problem of whether immigration is a net gain or loss to British society and its working class but whether politicians have been making promises they can keep.

In a move that may upset some Labour supporters, she also reiterated calls for resources such as housing to be prioritised for those who have lived in Britain for longer.

There have been numerous social systems that have given sections of the population preferential access to public resources before. In America they called it Jim Crow, in South Africa they called it Apartheid. Am I being unfair? Hell no! We are not so innocent as Margaret Hodge. Racism is a system and a code. Long-term residents in this case means white people. Indeed, the following sentence in the Grauniad report says:

Her comments come as Labour has conceded that it must do more to woo white working class voters.

Grisly nonsense, and not in the slightest bit pro-working class. It is, as Len suggests:

A purely sentimental, pseudo-ethnic model of class, in which a working class person is defined by certain sumptuary and sartorial habits, attributes which make for convenient genre markers but which by themselves yield no sociological insight. It is an object of nostalgia and melancholia, the deus ex machina of reactionary polemic that strictly does not coincide with the working class as it actually lives and reproduces itself.

The working class is black, white and every shade inbetween. If there are Alf Garnetts in the working class then there are at least as many Frank Owens, it's about time someone spoke out for latter, instead of pandering to the former.

Just in case you were wondering...

The metallurgical composition of your average bending unit is 30% iron, 40% titanium, 40% lead, 40% zinc, 40% dolomite, 20% or 40% chromium, 40-50% osmium, 0.04% nickel, 60% storage space, 40% scrap metal and 40% luck.

Hard times

In times like these its hard not to cling to the flimsiest of hopes. The most ragged is surely the most persistent, that a Labour government will make it all better. Well Ed Balls is trying to shake that idea off.

The Shadow Cabinet has been banned by Ed Balls from promising to reverse any of the Coalition Government's spending cuts as part of Labour's attempt to regain credibility on the economy.

A mildly interesting notion; does Ed Balls run the Shadow Cabinet?

In an interview with The Independent, the shadow Chancellor said: "No matter how much we dislike particular Tory spending cuts or tax rises, we can't make promises now to reverse them. I'm clear that I won't do that and neither will any of my Shadow Cabinet colleagues."

It seems reasonable, anti-demagogic. The only problem is that pesky democratic deficit. If you are a student facing sky-high fees, if you are unemployed and facing the grisly prospect of 'the work programme', if you are a young parent watching Sure Start centres being closed, if you are a pensioner coping with mounting heating bills, if you are a public sector worker being forced to hand over a day's wages (in the form of increased pension contributions) to pay for bankers in need... if you are any of those people and more besides, who speaks for you, you stands up for you in parliament? At the moment no one does. What's wrong with the Labour Party standing up for them? What's wrong with the Labour Party standing up for them and even losing?

We have come to know the Labour Party is not an agent of change. It has accepted the broad political, ideological and economic consensus, however arrived at, whether it has been Keynesianism or Neo-Liberalism. The myth of Labour radicalism was built on the back of a general radicalisation during World War Two. The Attlee government, great as it was, merely received the movement's momentum.

What can change the situation? The proposed strike of 3 million workers on November 30th can start. Get the ballot on, win the ballot, prepare for picketing, organise a demo in town; if you are not being called out do your best to support those who are. There does need to be more action after this day however, a one-day strike of a few thousand people in particular sector is a token gesture, 3 million strikers is not a token, it's a declaration.

Public sector workers will fight and they will not be alone.

The art of association

This is how it goes:

Gilad Atzmon is a racist. Racism is bad. Left wingers should be against racism but an otherwise respectable left wing publishing house is putting out a book by Gilad Atzmon. This should not happen. The otherwise respectable authors on their roster should not be associated with this, but it should not happen. The otherwise respectable authors on the publishing house's roster should not be associated with Gilad Atzmon and anyone who does associate them with Gilad Atzmon is getting the wrong impression. It is wrong to associate the other authors with Gilad Atzmon. What you shouldn't be doing is associating them with him. I'm not suggesting you associate them. If you associate them with Gilad Atzmon you are wrong. Don't ASSOCIATE THEM WITH GILAD ATZMON. They are not associated with Gilad Atzmon.

One more... for no raisin

Just about my favourite REM song. It would have been great if they could have taken on Kate Pierson as a full-time vocalist with Michael Stipe. Not a wasted second on this song.

It's the end of the world as we know it...

But I feel fine. A satellite the size of a bus is due to fall to Earth somewhere between now and Saturday night, somewhere between Britain and Siberia. Are you worried?

"Most of the Earth's surface is covered by water or is uninhabited, so nobody tends to even see this kind of debris when it does land," Hugh Lewis, a space debris expert at Southampton University, told the Guardian.

"Those pieces that do survive re-entry have slowed down a lot, but they are still travelling quite fast. Because of their size, they would do significant damage if they hit a structure or a person, but the chances of that happening are remote," he added.

According to a certain news channel I saw this morning at work, if you do find a pice of the satellite please return it to NASA, as you should respect their propetah! And finally, if you're still picturing a tumbling man-made asteroid, don't worry this really isn't the end of the world... or is it?

Wherever the spacecraft lands, it will give the relevant authorities valuable experience ahead of a potentially more dangerous event in early November, when the German Rosat satellite re-enters at 28,000kph. The German space agency, DLR, said up to 30 pieces of the spacecraft might survive re-entry, with a combined mass of more than one-and-a-half tonnes.

Dun-dun-duh!

So long, REM, we hardly knew ye

And that's the point with a band that trades on lyrical mystique. They were perhaps the original indie dweebs gone overground. If their bandwagon wasn't stalled by New Adventures in Hi-Fi (generally good but way too long) then today's news was on the cards since Bill Berry left in 1997, that was really the beginning of the end. REM had fewer big hits than you think, though everyone should check out their 80s stuff too (Murmur is fantastic in my opinion).

REM were a college rock band. In America this refers to the network of campus radio stations, which popularised a certain style of music, not metal, between 60s retro and punk. As an aside, campus culture is under threat, globally speaking caught between cuts and profit making; a vision of education austere and functional.

In Britain the ideal of comprehensive education is being dismantled. This will impoverish popular culture, pop music especially. Musicians have traditionally met in college or on the dole queue. Both avenues are closing, if not already closed. Popular culture is nothing without free time and disposable income. We face a future of more and more public schoolkids dressing up and twanging banjos.

Let's pee in the corner
Let's pee on the spot-light...

Pink Noise!

Minor interest: "self-styled..."

I was browsing through the Wikipedia entry for Tony Cliff yesterday when I came across an alarm bell phrase:

"The SWP is now the largest self-styled revolutionary party in Britain, and the leading group in the International Socialist Tendency".

Alarm bell phrases are ones that trigger suspicion, something's up. In this case I'm not so sure but it's worth dwelling on "self-styled revolutionary" for a moment.

All revolutionaries, in fact all political actors are self-styled. Politics is an art and therefore subjective. Mainstream politics has an aura of objectivity because it is the politics of the state. Neo-liberalism, the current state philosophy, only appears real because in the 70s and 80s certain political actors conspired to make it real. Marxism, which at one point is a political philosophy, also claims to be a science.

In their more sober momements bourgeois advocates acknowledge the scientific aspect of Marxism. How could they not at a time like this? But Marx has to be continually undone. When he died the only mainstream paper to acknowledge the funeral was the London Times. The obituary suggested his system would die with him. How many times now has Marxism been subdued only to come back to life?

Any radical theory brought to life, especially one connected with socialism, is generally described as "self-styled". It can't possibly be objective or practical, it can only be imposed. Have you ever had that argument, "stop trying to impose your views on me"? It actually means, "stop trying to convince me of something using argument backed up by observation and/or fact".

The "self-styled" insinuation is meant to undermine. The most recent example being the self-styled Rory Carroll's reporting from Venezuela. During the last decade the Bolivarian government defied neo-liberal gravity, something clearly wrong in that!

Greater Manchester Police vs Democracy

For two weeks running council officials backed up by coppers have broken up campaigning stalls in the centre of Manchester. By an amazing coincidence the Tory party is due to hold its annual conference there in the first week of October.

Look at them, a murderous group of cut throats if ever you saw them. But our Brave Bobbies soon put a stop to their shennanigans!

... Suspicion of attempting to wield an opinion without a licence.

And they weren't the only group attacked.

Fuck me, my bowl's full of skinheads!

Charlie Brooker should really stick to one thing. When he sticks to the awfulness of the mass media he never fails. Today, for example:

It [Brooker's ire] stems from the notion of "brand ambassadors", that tit-awful phrase for stars who become synonymous with a commercial product in exchange for a mere fortune. The idea is that when you glance at, say, an Activia yoghurt in the supermarket, thanks to its high-profile star-fronted advertising campaign, you'll think of Martine McCutcheon and make positive connections to the fun times you saw her getting drooled over by Hugh Grant in Love Actually or run over by Frank Butcher in Albert Square. And your basic ape brain, which perpetually craves love and acceptance, will make you chuck said yoghurt into your basket in a desperate attempt to make some of that McCutcheon magic rub off on your own sorry bones.

Because you want to be Martine McCutcheon. You want to be her so badly you're prepared to eat her. In the form of yoghurt. Yoghurt that also improves your ability to defecate. That's what Activia's really about, of course – regulating your guts so you defecate better. In a franker, more honest universe, Martine would defecate in the commercial. But she doesn't even blow off. She just smiles a lot. Although come to think of it, she does smile a bit like someone who's just evacuated their bowels after several days of trying. So maybe she's still on-message.

The article also reminds me of one of my favourite 80s soundbites: fuck me, my bowl's full of skinheads! Read. You'll see. Oh we did laugh, bitter, gallows humour.

In other news...

All this next week you can follow the Liberal Democrat annual conference - reporting live from 1911! This year's Tory party conference will be taking place in 1811. The Labour party, judging by Blue Labour, will hold their event in 1381. It is, however, that Ed Millipede will distance himself from Wat Tyler's rebels.

Vous avez obtenu les pistolets de rayon muslamic

Yet more evidence, see here. So, in honour of alleged enlightenment values and secularism we've translated (meaning Babelfished) Muslamic Ray Guns into French:

I m ici à protester bien Je vais sur une marche la cause I veulent que la Grande-Bretagne soit en arrière les Anglais. Je veux que la Grande-Bretagne soit en arrière les Anglais. I' m allant sur une marche la cause i veulent que la Grande-Bretagne soit en arrière les Anglais Je veux que la Grande-Bretagne soit au sujet des Anglais Vous avez obtenu la loi inter-racial et l'infidèle muslamic; essai re d'obtenir leur loi au-dessus de notre pays et son événement, il se produit, it's se produisant dans d'autres pays it' ; s se produisant dans d'autres pays, comme, comme you' ; le obtenu, you' ; le VE a obtenu… Vous avez obtenu les pistolets de rayon muslamic, pistolets de rayon muslamic. Vous avez obtenu les pistolets de rayon muslamic, pistolets de rayon muslamic. Pistolets de rayon, pistolets de rayon. Vous avez obtenu les pistolets de rayon muslamic, pistolets de rayon muslamic. Vous avez obtenu les pistolets de rayon muslamic, pistolets de rayon muslamic. Pistolets de rayon, pistolets de rayon.

See, it all makes complete sense now, doesn't it?

Did America win the War on Terror?

Worth thinking about for the moment but, being a bunch of ignorant yobs, we need someone to do our thinking for us. Here's some words from a book:

The war is not meant to be won, it is meant to be continuous. Hierarchical society is only possible on the basis of poverty and ignorance. This new version is the past and no different past can ever have existed. In principle the war effort is always planned to keep society on the brink of starvation. The war is waged by the ruling group against its own subjects and its object is not the victory over either Eurasia or East Asia, but to keep the very structure of society intact.

Well, we're not quite on the brink of starvation but remember, the war was, and still is being, fought at home as well as abroad. Think about the various anti-terrorism laws, the foundation of organisations such as Homeland Security in America, or the Anti-Extremism Unit here in Britain, now well funded and tenacious bureaucracies, difficult to remove. Think about the concurrent ideological push, Islamophobia in particular, but the rise of bitter, fearful right-wing politics in general, the fact that each fraction of the right, mainstream, populist and fascist, feeds off each other.

The war was as much about shifting the balance further in favour of the US-based ruling class at home as well as abroad. Did America and it's allies win the War on Terror? When we say America we mean the ruling class, in particular it's neo-liberal fraction. When we say war we have to ackowledge it is still going on. At home at least they are winning. We are not talking here about "the potential for a fightback" or them being "weak but nasty", but actual results. The global anti-austerity movement, vibrant though it is, has not broken through anywhere. We don't need Greek-style resistance, we need better than Greek-style resistance.

We can do something about that, you know?

Because I'm not a doomstruck meanie all the time

Here's some pictures of destruction and doom. A nice little set in today Graun, illustrating life in Leningrad during the German siege.

It's really an occasion, for me, to recommend an author and his finest book. Victor Serge and The Unforgiving Years.

If the Russian Revolution had taken a different turn, if it had succeeded, and that's a big if, Serge may well have been known as one of the greatest Russian authors of the 20th century. Then again, if the Russian Revolution had taken a different turn Serge would have written very different novels. His chief attribute, apart from being an acute observer of the revolution and its aftermath (unlike other supposedly acute observers, Serge had the advantage of actually have participated in the revolution wholeheartedly and practically) is his style of writing. It has the knack of being personal yet non-egoistic. Serge apparently professed to hate the word "I", yet his novels, especially his earlier ones, clearly follow his life's journey.

The Unforgiving Years was his last and best work, a four-part piece that seem impressionistic and disconnected (like, say, the free-standing chapters of Goodbye to Berlin), until the stunning ending. The central chapters are set in the ruins of Leningrad and, later, Berlin. Themes such as "the flame beneath the snow" hint nicely, I think, on the weird revolutionary potential that gathered toward the end of the war - leaderless and, of course, cruelly snuffed out.

Bitter, moi?

Utter disaster reigns across the planet. Humanity is all but destroyed. Nuclear fallout is fast approaching. The last three humans are gathered together in an empty street discussing what to do. They are a socialist, an anarchist and a Labour Party hack.

The socialist says:

"We're up against it but we have to fight. We must find food and build some sort of shelter before the fallout begins. The quicker we work the better our chances will be".

But the anarchist disagrees:

"This is nonsense, we need to take direct action against the cloud. I'll stand behind you two and chuck stuff at it".

The Labour Party hack sighs:

"What ultra-left nonsense; the pair of you! How can you consider taking action when we haven't even concluded negotiations with the cloud?"

There is no agreement. The trio repair different parts of street. The socialist goes searching for food in the various bombed out houses, the anarchist meanwhile starts burning piles of newspapers. The Labour Party hack departs altogether but returns an hour later with good news, feeling pleased with himself after booking a suite in a nearby abandoned hotel, ideal for further talks. But, alas, he looks up and sees it's too late, the cloud is about to break... The Labour Party hack then has an idea. He goes up to the anarchist, who's still burning stuff:

"Hey anarchist, I've got an idea".

He explains the idea to the anarchist, whispering, even though there's no one to overhear. Moments later the pair call the socialist out:

"Hey socialist, over here. We've got something to show you".

The socialist is reluctant, the nuclear rain is about to fall, but is eventually persuaded to come over to his comrades. The anarchist and the hack then bludgeon the socialist to death.

As the first drops of scaling, radioactive water fall from the sky, the Labour Party hack, chewing on a piece of the dead socialist, remarks to the anarchist:

"This is it, this is truly the end. Such a shame it had to end this way".

"Yeah" agrees the anarchist, face wet with gore, "but at least we didn't let the SWP hijack our movement".

I may seem calm on the outside...

... and idiot glee

Brian Eno is not only a great musician but a wonderful humanist thinker, the kind of man who, in a better world, would be asked to design whole cities, not just prop up dodgy rock bands.

Together with a chap called Peter Schmidt he developed a game called Oblique Strategies, a series of cards with gnomic phrases printed on them, designed to encourage lateral thinking:

"These cards evolved from our separate observations of the principles underlying what we are doing. Sometimes they were recognized in retrospect (intellect catching up with intuition), sometimes they were identified as they were happening, sometimes they were formulated. They can be used as a pack (a set of posibilities being continuously reviewed in the mind) or by drawing a single card from a shuffled pack when a dilemma occurs in a working situation. In this case the card is trusted even if it appropriateness is quite unclear. They are not final, as new ideas will present themselves, and others will become self-evident."

Though aimed at musicians anyone who wants to partake in creative arts can use them. Here are some drawn at random (the way they're supposed to be drawn):

Courage!
Simply a matter of work
Remove ambiguities and convert to specifics
Go outside. Shut the door.
Spectrum analysis
Intentions -nobility of -humility of -credibility of
Not building a wall but making a brick
Make a sudden, destructive unpredictable action; incorporate
Repetition is a form of change
What is the reality of the situation?
Listen to the quiet voice
Take away the elements in order of apparent non-importance

Giggles

Republican presidential hopeful Michelle Bachman is opposed to the HPV vaccine (not to mention the Soviet Union).

These people run the world, folks.

Me, myself, I don't know what she's so worried about, vaccines don't exist. No, they're magic serums. Vaccination doesn't occur because it is the interaction of amino acids, proteins, genetics and, ultimately, the descent of species through billions of years of natural selection, and that didn't happen folks, and there's no evidence it ever did!

Now stick your fingers in your ears and yell "lalalalalalala" until the rapture comes.

Cultural commentator in shock conclusion: "pop's not what it used to be"

If rock stars are our functional equivalent of Greek gods, cultural criticism is our version of scholastic debate. The big wheel has turned, now the arrow is pointing at grunge. Everyone it seems agrees that, while great music was made, in the end the music industry killed the Seattle Scene. Where did it all go wrong?

Colin Horgan of the Graun isn't sure but does an interesting turn trying to find out.

Two points have to be mentioned. (1) All culture is in some way retrospective. Any completely original sight or sound is in fact a new combination of old ones. Things have to be that way. Inspiration must predate composition. (2) It is difficult to make an unambigous case for Generation X passion and activism without acknowledging its obvious passivity. The climax to the generation's consider anthem is, after all, "I tried so hard/So hard to find/Oh well/Whatever/Never mind". Exhausted acceptance of the system began long before the Strokes, Is This It?

The conclusion?

In this context, hipster nostalgia makes a crazy sort of sense: rather than summon the energy for a defining statement of anger or outrage, Gen Y has only mustered a shrug, and waited as the consumerism that grunge initially fought off washes over.


"It's sad to think what the state of rock'n'roll will be in 20 years from now," Cobain told Azerrad. "It just seems like when rock'n'roll is dead, the whole world's gonna explode … it's already turned into nothing but a fashion statement and an identity for kids to use as a tool."


Rock'n'roll has gone from a linear derivative art form to an abstracted, nominal designation. It's not dead, just more or less spent.

There's just one problem. Who gives a flying monkey-wotsit if rock and roll is dead or not? The idea that pop music is some kind of vector for significant social change is based on a brief conjecture, mostly an illusion, sustained by baby-boomer arrogance. The 1960s counterculture fought its toughest battles in the United States. In the end, however, it was an attempted alternative capitalism. There is no capitalist alternative to capitalism, as all the current headscratching about the recession and the sovereign debt crisis should just be further proof. You either accept the system or you don't... as Kurt Cobain found out.

The author hints at a reason why this slow death is taking place. The medium of rock and roll is (or was) the single*, which is now an almost defunct form. At the smallest scale the cultural cycle is so fast now rock and roll seems a pedestrian art now. Whole cultural phenomena can rise and fall while a rock band spends 18 months diddling about recording its new album.

* A sub-medium would be the radio.

Banks given until 2019 to take what they can and run

But THEN they have to stop. Until then Britain wants as much Russian gangster cash as possible. Of course, by 2019 we'll all be fighting 8ft tall radioactive scorpions (probably stamped with the Barclays logo) for the last drops of potable water:

According to the IFS, the squeeze on living standards will be the result of earnings failing to keep pace with prices, as well as the tax and benefit changes announced by the government to tackle the UK's record peacetime budget deficit.

"Welfare cuts and tax rises will act to reduce household incomes, and those with the lowest incomes are clearly set to lose the most from these reforms as a percentage of income (with the important exception of those with the very highest incomes). This is likely to increase poverty, other things being equal, offsetting some of the falls in poverty over the past decade."

Of course it isn't a record peacetime deficit (there are high levels of government borrowing, but that's another matter). The national debt was many times greater in 1948, when the NHS was founded (see picture). What's interesting in the IFS report is the line highlighted:

The IFS analysis is included in The Great Recession and the Distribution of Income, published on Monday by the London School of Economics. Professor Stephen Jenkins of the LSE said: "We were surprised at how little household incomes changed in the years immediately after the Great Recession began. This has been the worst macroeconomic downturn in most OECD countries since the Great Depression of the 1930s when there were substantial increases in poverty rates and other significant changes to the income distribution."

A pay freeze relative to inflation is a pay cut. This has been the strategy for several decades; hold down wages to raise profits. With inflation at 4-5% that's a big cut. Of course, it only half-worked, all those years. The previous mini long-boom was driven by speculation. Low effective demand combined with large amounts surplus capital, encouraged a culture of widespread borrowing and lending (borrowing to lend sometimes). It was fitting then this global pyramid scheme foundered on subprime mortgages.

Warning that pain had been delayed but not avoided, the IFS said families with children would be hit harder by Osborne's tax and benefit changes than other family types on average, with the poorest 10th of households suffering income losses of more than 8% over the next three years. "Recent IFS modelling predicted that child poverty will rise in each of the three years between 2010-11 and 2013-14, and that it will be about two percentage points higher in 2013-14 as a result of the tax and benefit reforms planned by the current government."

If you can't forsake the god of capital accumulation you will have to sacrifice your children to appease him.

What's the bloody matter with everyone?

More impressionistic twaddle about the subject of class and fascism, from someone who should know MUCH better. There is something deeply wrong in our society when almost no one can seem to talk about class in a remotely objective way. The EDL reckon they're working class, lots of liberals think they are too. David Cameron reckons he's middle-class. Copyright law is socialist. The police reclaim the streets. White people have gone black. Privatisation is reform. Cats are dogs, up is down and that big pile of shit over there is actually ice cream - take a bite, no, I insist, luv your government.

But seriously folks, fascism is a middle class movement. The illusion that is is a working class movement comes in part from liberal fear/fantasies about the violent potency of the underclass; if anything the typical EDL member is not a rippling Ubermensch but a spotty lad. Fascism is middle class because (1) it dovetails philosophically and psychologically with the deranged small-property owner and (2) the practical committment it requires suits the middle class. Think about typical EDL activity today...

Which honest to goodness prole has the time, let alone the money, to hop on a bus or train most weekends to attempt mass-ultra violence in town centres? Committing to street fascism in the long run is committing to a criminal record. Who can just afford to do that? The EDL is in part built out of football firms. These firms have money.

This should all be obvious, but it seems not.

It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times

Give a thousand monkeys a thousand typewriters and they'll eventually produce Shakespeare. Give a thousand nazis a thousand typewriters and sooner or later they'll give you The World According to Clarkson.

Help for Heroes

Our Brave Boys defending us from the evil machinations of Iraqi hotel workers:

Among the humiliations forced upon the detainees, the report said, were toilets being flushed over their heads, beatings with metal bars, verbal abuse, being forced to "dance like Michael Jackson" and having lighter fuel poured over them.


One officer who visited the detention centre told the inquiry that the detainees looked as though they had been "in a car crash".


After the death of Baha Mousa, the surviving detainees were subjected to further assaults and "trophy photographs" were said to have been taken of them being beaten.

Was Iraq the new Vietnam? Who cares anymore? They were only Muslamics. Help your heroes, look the other way, forget about it, look, X Factor is back.

A CiF post that ACTUALLY suggests we should "let the racists march"

For some reason Deborah Orr has stuck in my mind. Ever since, years and years ago, I saw her on BBC Breakfast News in a small panel discussion debating the sexualisation of children. Forgetting, for a moment, that it wasn't Newsnight Review, Orr opined:

"There are some children's clothes being made with words like 'fuck' printed on them".

It was quite a while ago, I am communicating the gist of what she said. Oh the presenters were sorry for the unforeseen profanity. What they forgot was to ask: Really? Are there actually children's clothes out there with the word (or words like) 'fuck' printed on them? Really? Actually? Are you sure?

Anyway, preamble over, Deborah Orr doesn't like lefty marches but doesn't seem to mind far right ones. Why?

I had given up by the time of the million-strong march against Iraq in February 2003, having become too cheesed off on previous marches. That's a shame, I guess, because by all accounts that march was different in character, the concerned citizens greatly outnumbering the usual suspects. But, on my last anti-war march, I'd been stuck behind a group of young men who appeared passionately to believe that 9/11 had been engineered by "the Jews".

Really? That's pretty serious (although you have to admit [two] million-strong political manifestations by their very nature attract all kinds of people). Who were these people?

A "broad church" is one thing.

No, seriously, who were they? Any idea?

A conspiracy-theorist lunatic fringe is another.

It would be good to know. As a serious journalist you wouldn't just want to be casting wild aspersions here. Did you stop to find out who these young men were?

It was all so unpleasant that I peeled off, and marched over Lambeth Bridge to Chez Gerard, and steak frites instead.

So, no idea, no need to have an idea, lefties tolerate unidentified racist conspiracy nuts but not Deborah Orr. Shame on them!

Meanwhile:

I was relieved too, when a huge police presence stopped Saturday's "static protest" by the English Defence League from developing into another kind of confrontation, this time against those who abhor the EDL. Viewing protest as a way to confront the state, and the police, is not constructive. Viewing protest as a way to challenge other citizens, whose mainstream views you do not agree with, is even less so.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, actively opposing the EDL is as bad as supporting them; and when the Normandy landings happened I bet there were people tutting at the Allied invasion too! Also, it makes you wonder what organised protest is for. You can't challenge the state, you can't challenge civil society; since it was taken off the air you can't even Challenge Anneka (there's a reference for you). So, got the message? Deborah Orr doesn't want you to oppose fascist manifestations.

Yet, I was still appalled that the EDL march was banned.

Let the racists march through your neighbourhood because:

Banning groups or their activities, without evidence that they are conspiring to break the law, or encourage others to do so, just feeds the group's feeling that what they have to say is so important...

Could you make Tommy Robinson more self-important? I doubt it. Besides, it's not as if there isn't weighty evidence showing the EDL are about bringing racist violence to our streets. They attack mosques, and have done so and threatened to do so on numerous occasions. This is not exactly inconsistent with their ideology. Numerous of their members are also in the fascist BNP. They frequently attack members of the public, usually but not exclusively brown skinned people. They attack Hindu temples, trade union demonstrations and public meetings.

I could go on. The point is wisemen and fools knows the EDL didn't want to come to Tower Hamlets to go shopping in Canary Wharf, dine out in Brick Lane or go clubbing at 93 Feet East.

Never mind anti-war demos, Comment Is Free is definitely a broad church.

Minor cultural thungumybobs

Everyone likes the music of Queen, in the same way everyone likes On the Road or Catch 22: they all seem amazing and sophisticated when you're 14 or so, but there really are better things out there and you realise it soon enough. Monday would have been Sir Fredward's 65th birthday and the Graun culture pages are wondering what he would have been up to these days. As is rightly pointed out he was a colourful, talented, beloved figure, but he wasn't that far out. If ever he was bought in, he sold out, at the absolute latest, by playing Sun City and. If Iggy Pop or Johnny Rotten are anything to go by he would probably have ended up shilling some awful, awful product.

The logical thing to do would be to stick up some Youtube footage of Queen. I won't, because, the anniversary reminded me of a long forgotten adult cartoon show, called House of Rock. It's about ten years old. I still find it funny, but probably shouldn't. It's borderline transgression-of-liberal-values type humour, the kind that was taken to revolting lengths by the likes of Jimmy Carr. If nothing else, however, it had the tragically underused line: "I WIN! I WIN! YOU LOSE! GET OUT! GET THE FUCK OUT OF IT BOLAN! GO ON, FUCK OFF!"

I say tragically unused, I use it on all appropriate occasions.

Small mercies

TV is the highest artform known to man and British TV is the greatest in the world and anyone who doubts that is a fool or a communist. In that spirit we'd like to add to the autumn schedules:

Russian Buckaroo - the same as normal Buckaroo, just with real mules.

Location, Location, Location: hospital makeover - where Kirsty Allsopp, TV Tory and peeling sack of crap turns a hospital into badly needed luxury flats.

Wheel of Riots - has lots of potential. It could either be a gameshow where the names and adresses of upper class Londoners with broomsticks are drawn from a tombola for 'riot makeover' OR it could be a mock-discussion panel where once a week a reason for the riots happening is drawn from a hat and a mainstream politician has to speak solidly and convincingly for a minute as if he/she believe it will wash (note: rational explanations are strictly prohibited).

Live Teacher/Pupil Boxing - or Michael Gove's new strategy for discipline.

NHS Factor - where sick people plead with Gary Barlow/Louie Walsh for an operation.

The London Metropolitan Price is Right - where contestants have to guess how much this officer is worth.

Jamie goes to Venus - because no cooker has a 500 degree setting.

Adelewatch - if you hear her being played on TV, radio, in films, in shopping centres, sports stadiums, up hill or down dale please don't have nightmares.

Ruled by loonies pt 2

David Cameron wants to make it even harder for unemployed people claiming benefits to refuse work. Now you may be thinking, with 2.5 million registered unemployed and some areas of the country where an average of 50 or so people apply for each vacant position, you may be thinking that work is refusing people, not the other way round.

But what kind of ideas are they actually weighing up...?

Ideas pushed by No 10 included measures that would force the unemployed and those claiming jobseeker's allowance to spend an entire working week in the pursuit of finding a job. But on Friday lunchtime the Department for Work and Pensions said that particular idea had been ruled out as "not workable". By Friday evening the department was instructed that the idea could be a possible candidate for tightening the welfare regime.

You hear that? You need to spend 36 hours a week, every week, looking for work and, presumably, be able to prove it as well. If you run out of jobs to apply for why not stand on a street corner with a sandwich board: "will vote Tory for food"?

Treasury officials had also been keen on a suggestion that would see those people without a history of national insurance contributions unable to turn down suggested employment opportunities.

So thats what young people are called these days!



But they're right folks. It's time to take on the workshy, make the feckless and decadent classes pay, egregious, idle, thieving, born with a grotesque sense of entitlement... after all they caused the recession.

Meanwhile, in totally unconnected, separate piece of news this is David (son of an investment banker) Cameron hanging out with the royal family (distant relatives) in Scotland on Saturday.

Together we're invincible

Well done, anti-fascists!

Well done everyone who participated in yesterday's anti-fascist activity; from the thousands of people blocking Whitechapel Road to the RMT shutting down stations the EDL wanted to 'muster' in. I'm even warming slightly to Peter Tatchell who, shit placard aside, was down at Aldgate East crossroads.

What have we learned? Well, I think it's that mass mobilisation is right and good. Why should anyone run and hide when the EDL come to their borough or town? Whose streets? Our streets! And they damn well were yesterday. We marched in Tower Hamlets, not the nazis.

But there are some who won't learn or are, perhaps, too worried about protecting the Labour Party's left flank. We should not leave it to the police. Why? Because the police don't think the EDL are violent right wingers and, according to one copper, Muslims should open a line of dialogue with them.

Outrageous!

Be in no doubt, if you reach out a hand to the EDL, if you even so much as get within arms length of them, they will try to burn you with lighter fluid.

Libya

There have been lots of strange and distressful things (Distressful? Is that a word? It is now) coming out of the current Libyan conflict, probably the least of which is the knotted, wishful thinking of some people, regarding this 'revolution'. No one should cry for Gadaffi but no one should be in doubt, this is not Libyan self-emancipation at hand. Today's BBC News says:

A key summit on Libya, hosted by French President Nicolas Sarkozy and UK PM David Cameron, is to begin in Paris.

Note hosted by Sarkozy and Cameron to begin in Paris. Don't worry, the National Transitional Council will be represented too... it's only polite.